All of these have a 2010 and Australian theme. Some are in quite bad taste......others just witty.
Enjoy.......
If not Australian, think about the context. Many are very clever. From a collection of about 50, courtesy of a column in the Australian Financial Review.
Sleigh intercepted off Christmas Island
Buy Hambag
Six white bloomers drying in the blazing sun
Who’s Santa’s Favorite? Rudolph the brown-nosed reindeer!!
Rudolph the green-nosed reindeer- proudly powered by polar panels
Oh yuk!! Dad’s got a bum cracker!
Wreck the malls with shopping trolleys...ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.
Police to Granny with a bottle of sherry: come with us, you’re a well known trifle-maker!
Showing posts with label christmas. Show all posts
Showing posts with label christmas. Show all posts
Monday, 27 December 2010
Tuesday, 21 December 2010
A Modern FIRST Christmas
No, I did not make this video on you tube........but it is worth a look. Over 2 million hits and still rising rapidly.
A take on the first Christmas, 2010 style!
use the link -www.youtube.com/watch?v=vZrf0PbAGSk
or watch it here:
WOULD NOT LOAD:
A take on the first Christmas, 2010 style!
use the link -www.youtube.com/watch?v=vZrf0PbAGSk
or watch it here:
WOULD NOT LOAD:
Monday, 21 December 2009
What a Blow - Cyclone Laurence!
Cyclone Laurence is crossing the NW WA coast as I write this, with winds around 290km/hr, a Cat 5 cyclone.
Although the area is relatively uninhabited, poor old Sandfire Roadhouse is getting a big blast .......AGAIN. Not a nice Christmas present.
This is real "Cyclone Alley" in Australia.
For more read: http://www.bom.gov.au/cgi-bin/wrap_fwo.pl?IDW24100.txt
There is a link to the cyclone track here -http://www.bom.gov.au/products/IDW60281.shtml
It is likely to bring refreshing rain and winds predicted above 100km/hr to Central Australia over the next few days, and might extend the rain into the dry western areas of NSW as well after that.
Although the area is relatively uninhabited, poor old Sandfire Roadhouse is getting a big blast .......AGAIN. Not a nice Christmas present.
This is real "Cyclone Alley" in Australia.
For more read: http://www.bom.gov.au/cgi-bin/wrap_fwo.pl?IDW24100.txt
There is a link to the cyclone track here -http://www.bom.gov.au/products/IDW60281.shtml
It is likely to bring refreshing rain and winds predicted above 100km/hr to Central Australia over the next few days, and might extend the rain into the dry western areas of NSW as well after that.
Thursday, 17 December 2009
Can't Get Christmassy
I just can’t get Christmassy. It seems to happen regularly in this environment, around this time of year.
The tropics, especially in the Southern hemisphere are just not conducive to thinking Christmas.
It is stinking damn hot – humid, hot, very hot, hot and very hot, mostly without too much rain, just enough for the ground to be wet from a shower or storm so when the sun comes out after rain it is around 95 – 195% humidity. You sweat [ note SWEAT – even ladies do more than ”glow”] while standing still in this weather. It is very hot and tricky to get Christmas cooking done, let alone to ensure the products can be kept in good condition for Christmas.
Then there is the issue that school and the academic year finish in early December in Australia, and the long annual vacation starts. This is geared around the temperate cycle of southern Australia, where these sorts of decisions get made or were made in eons past, to be imposed on those hardy souls in the tropics. In the northern hemisphere education is not in vacation mode at this time.
Because of this, everyone wants things completed before they go away.
Around this point, and the fact that the weather is about to get very wet, and even more humid, every contractor and workman is urging forwards to finish work, so they can either go on holidays too, or to get it all done before very wet weather sets in during monsoonal periods, making outside work difficult, while still complaining about the hot weather.
It is also the time for cultivating and planting crops, pastures and hay fields. If that is not done in a timely manner, then they do not grow well, and poor outcomes result. Once again, it makes for a time constrained, stressful, critical period........and not too easy to feel Christmassy, or find the time to feel that way.
I think of the northern hemisphere and the tabloid depictions of Christmas – snow, inside warm houses, short days, cooking and general Christmas preparations and lovely glowing Christmassy lights. Work is slacking off a little, after the more frantic activities of the days of summer and fall when a lot of outside construction and agricultural work is done. Education and academia are well into a new academic year, and while there is a break around Christmas, it is not the 6 - 12 weeks seen in Australia. Sure, it is cold, but then that is part of the Christmas ethos, and also related to warm plum pudding and similar goodies.
It is hard to get Christmassy – too time poor and it is too hot, and people are too busy.
It is not about being like the Christmas grinch or the rest of the anti- Christmas forces. It is not about anti religious zeal or anything related to Christianity. One would like to be Christmassy, a bit more upbeat about the celebrations and all they mean. Please find me a bit of spare time.
So what is to be done?
Some wags have a Christmas in July celebration here in Darwin. But that is a bit hard, when NO ONE else does that.
Is the option to go north for Christmas an answer, succumb to the cold of the northern hemisphere? Will that recreate part of the Christmas spirit?
The tropics, especially in the Southern hemisphere are just not conducive to thinking Christmas.
It is stinking damn hot – humid, hot, very hot, hot and very hot, mostly without too much rain, just enough for the ground to be wet from a shower or storm so when the sun comes out after rain it is around 95 – 195% humidity. You sweat [ note SWEAT – even ladies do more than ”glow”] while standing still in this weather. It is very hot and tricky to get Christmas cooking done, let alone to ensure the products can be kept in good condition for Christmas.
Then there is the issue that school and the academic year finish in early December in Australia, and the long annual vacation starts. This is geared around the temperate cycle of southern Australia, where these sorts of decisions get made or were made in eons past, to be imposed on those hardy souls in the tropics. In the northern hemisphere education is not in vacation mode at this time.
Because of this, everyone wants things completed before they go away.
Around this point, and the fact that the weather is about to get very wet, and even more humid, every contractor and workman is urging forwards to finish work, so they can either go on holidays too, or to get it all done before very wet weather sets in during monsoonal periods, making outside work difficult, while still complaining about the hot weather.
It is also the time for cultivating and planting crops, pastures and hay fields. If that is not done in a timely manner, then they do not grow well, and poor outcomes result. Once again, it makes for a time constrained, stressful, critical period........and not too easy to feel Christmassy, or find the time to feel that way.
I think of the northern hemisphere and the tabloid depictions of Christmas – snow, inside warm houses, short days, cooking and general Christmas preparations and lovely glowing Christmassy lights. Work is slacking off a little, after the more frantic activities of the days of summer and fall when a lot of outside construction and agricultural work is done. Education and academia are well into a new academic year, and while there is a break around Christmas, it is not the 6 - 12 weeks seen in Australia. Sure, it is cold, but then that is part of the Christmas ethos, and also related to warm plum pudding and similar goodies.
It is hard to get Christmassy – too time poor and it is too hot, and people are too busy.
It is not about being like the Christmas grinch or the rest of the anti- Christmas forces. It is not about anti religious zeal or anything related to Christianity. One would like to be Christmassy, a bit more upbeat about the celebrations and all they mean. Please find me a bit of spare time.
So what is to be done?
Some wags have a Christmas in July celebration here in Darwin. But that is a bit hard, when NO ONE else does that.
Is the option to go north for Christmas an answer, succumb to the cold of the northern hemisphere? Will that recreate part of the Christmas spirit?
Thursday, 25 December 2008
Hecta's Thunderheads for Christmas
The wet season is awesome. Majestic displays of heavenly firepower, towering thunderheads late in the afternoons, deep grey skies layered in deepening shades with the dark grey of rain often at the bottom.
While the last few days have been relatively drier, with little rain, the thunderheads still build late each day. Hecta is alive and well!
Hecta - a derivative from hectapascal - is the name given, by the Met bureau, to the regular build up of heavy monsoonal storm clouds most days across to the north and west of Darwin on the Tiwi Islands.
Where would we be without rain? And at this time of the year, the rain brings cooler relief from the heat and stifling humidity of the day.
While the last few days have been relatively drier, with little rain, the thunderheads still build late each day. Hecta is alive and well!
Hecta - a derivative from hectapascal - is the name given, by the Met bureau, to the regular build up of heavy monsoonal storm clouds most days across to the north and west of Darwin on the Tiwi Islands.
Where would we be without rain? And at this time of the year, the rain brings cooler relief from the heat and stifling humidity of the day.
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